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Worst Types of Kisses Techniques

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Worst Types of Kisses

The Katrina Kiss.

If you watch television and are even the least bit aware of world events, you know what I'm talking about! This is a kiss with entirely too much water. You are drooled on, slobbered on and when the kiss is over, you feel the need for a towel and maybe a shower. If you have a salivary gland problem, or your partner just makes you drool with lust, try swallowing before you start kissing.

The Iguana Kiss.

Crusty, crunchy, scaly lips are OUT. This is a true case of lizard lips! Keep that kisser soft and touchable. If you run your lips gently across your lovers neck, cheek and lips, they shouldn’t be left with what look like paper cuts.

The Prozac Kiss.

You might wonder if this tongue needs tranquilizers, as it appears to be having a nervous breakdown! Fast, furious, darting or high-speed swirling motions reminiscent of a washing machine on the rinse cycle. Interesting I suppose, if you’re into that sort of “household instrument” thing.

The Cave.

In this instance your partner’s mouth is open so wide that your tongue meets nothing but air on all sides! There is no exchange of sensation. It’s like you’re kissing by yourself! Try saying something and see if you hear an echo!

The Dirty Harry.

Guys, either grow a beard or shave. That 5 o’clock shadow thing looks cute, but it can wreck havoc on a woman’s tender body. Whisker burn just plain hurts. You don’t know what it feels like to have sand papery stubble pierce the skin around your eyes or cheeks! With half her face scraped off, a woman feels less than romantic and is more inclined to get up to seek medical treatment than she is to get busy.

Trolling for Tonsils.

Everybody likes tongue kissing, but my goodness! A little restraint on the depth of the kiss might be in order. If you have a tendency to extend your tongue to its full length in your partners mouth, be sure to check for a pulse when you get through.

The Kiss of Death.

You would swear that there is a body buried around here somewhere, because the smell of decomposition is mighty strong! Brush those teefis! Use one of the vast selections of mouthwashes on the market. Hey, they even come in various colors, so it's possible to find one that coordinates with your bathroom d├ęcor! Get a new toothbrush every 3 months! Visit your dentist and check for gum disease and cavities, both of which contribute to bad breath. Eat more fruits, vegetables, and drink more water to keep your insides clean too.

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